- How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
- They won’t touch it… it’s a hardware problem.
- How many mainframe programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
- Light bulbs do not go out on mainframes.
- How many Microsoft programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
- Did you try flipping the switch on and off? If that doesn’t work, just wait for the next service pack.
- How many Linux programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
- Only one, but you have to recompile the nation’s electric grid to get the change to take affect.
And Finally…
- How many consultants does it take to change a light bulb?
- Only one, but you get to bill for 10 hours.
Q: How many Project Managers does it take to change a light bulb?A: First they have to…* Find a sponsor for the light bulb change* Calculate the AR* Identify the cost savings to the company working in a lighted environment versus sub-standard work in the dark.* Get sign off on the AR* Find candidates with a history of electronic engineering, 10 years of hands on experience with the latest (2 year old) light bulbs, that can also change lamp shades, experience with EU plug adapters, Linux, Oracle, Java Script, .Net and Sql Server… Preferred.* Settle for a group that just knows .net – train them on light bulbs.* Assign Tasks, create a plan, get the sponsors to sign off on the plan.* Schedule Meetings* Rehire & rebuild your team* Rehire & rebuild your team.* 7 Months Later… It takes one PM to change a light bulb.
Q: How many Project Managers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: First they have to…
* Find a sponsor for the light bulb change
* Calculate the AR
* Identify the cost savings to the company working in a lighted environment versus sub-standard work in the dark.
* Get sign off on the AR
* Find candidates with a history of electronic engineering, 10 years of hands on experience with the latest (2 year old) light bulbs, that can also change lamp shades, experience with EU plug adapters, Linux, Oracle, Java Script, .Net and Sql Server… Preferred.
* Settle for a group that just knows .net – train them on light bulbs.
* Assign Tasks, create a plan, get the sponsors to sign off on the plan.
* Schedule Meetings
* Rehire & rebuild your team
* Rehire & rebuild your team.
* 7 Months Later… It takes one PM to change a light bulb.